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Life, and the discovery process

His voice sounded tired, raspy as if life had taken a baseball bat and slammed his soul into a wall. He was my best friend in high school; always a prankster, funny as hell...and now, he sounds like he's hanging on to the end of the knot on the rope. I wanted to hug him through the phone, and remind him that there are things still worth living for. The life was just gone out of his voice. A bitter-sweet phone reunion.

Which brings me to the subject of an eerie website I found today. You got your search engines, sure, and they let you have SOME free information on the web. But the site I found /today/ gives EVERYTHING with your name on/in/around it, including where you live, your phone numbers (even bizarre ones only the IRS has), what you've done, etc. The website is SO scary, it even had my comments posted to obscure people in communities.

That website scared the CRAP out of me, and I PRAY that none of my real friends ever find it. lolol :> And hellz no, I'm not sharing it. I'm sure by now that most of you know at least the last name I use in here (and other places). That's enough - or moreso - info than you really need unless you're sending me a nice fat check. But that's precisely how I found my friend's phone number and he now resides with his /parents/. This wasn't HIS listing, but I saw his name beside it and his approximate age (approximate age! it guesses!), and gave it a shot. He's living with his parents to support them now, from what I could ascertain. Still, his voice needs a hug.

This very same site led me to the only other person I've been searching for for YEARS. And I'll be damned if it wasn't the very same. I've never seen an engine that was so accurate as this one. Man. I'm scared. Anyyyyyyyway, his new wife answered, and she might not pass the message on if she's the jealous type (his first wife wasn't). We'll see in a few hours, I think.

Today's been chock full of nesting and working out, denying myself of all the caloric and fatty goodness that I /could've/ had, had I given in to the food beckoning me in the kitchen. I'm sipping cranberry juice and just happy that I'm under the 120 mark FINALLY. I think rowing daily helped me reach this goal. But I'm happy at this exact weight, and don't want to be back in a double zero ever again. I worked on another t-casso (this time on a window) and my arms were TIRED from all the rowing I've been doing so I had to stop. lol :> I got some laundry done, folded/hung up/drying and missed five phone calls during all this. I have no desire to go out tonight - which was the goal of two chicks who left messages - so I'm not gonna call them back.

I have a dinner date on Monday night, which will require me to look nice :)

Today FLEW by. I suppose that's all I have to say about it for now. :>

Comments

( 24 whispered — Speak )
writerwench
Feb. 1st, 2009 08:25 am (UTC)
That poor guy. I feel so sorry for him, and I don't know him! You've written about him so well. I don't know what that site is, but it sounds worrisome. The sort of information that the UK's paranoid, secretive, over-controlling government would LOVE to get hold of. I swear we're getting as bad as Russia - desperately heavily taxed, told nothing unless we invoke the Freedom of Information act and scream and yell (in legal terms) to be told what should be public information, patronised (did you know we don't have 'unemployed' anymore? The new propaganda is to regretfully refer to the more abstract idea of 'worklessness'), and the burden of the old, the sick, the young, and now the workless is ever heavier on those who still have productive jobs.
It could make a girl feel quite despondent.

But you've had a lovely domestic day, charging up your batteries! Well done on reaching 120! That's a great achievement. I hope tomorrow night is a super date.
none_too_subtle
Feb. 1st, 2009 11:00 am (UTC)
He ended up calling me back (as he said he would; I just doubted it) and we talked for /hours/. I'm so glad I found him! That site is scary for privacy reasons, as it gives out way too much information. I don't even know how I got there, nor did I start "looking people up" who I have less than good feelings for.

I was so glad to go under 120. That was my goal so if I just maintain now, I should be fine. I didn't realize you guys had it that rough. I feel social security blankets will be gone for those of us who worked all these years giving to it by the time I'm old enough to draw it. *sigh*

I ended up getting no sleep! lol It was a great day, however! Thank you about the date :)
writerwench
Feb. 1st, 2009 09:48 pm (UTC)
Depending on which newspaper/news channel you believe, Britain is facing a very, very grim time indeed, especially as over the last 20 years the manufacturing capacity of the country has been eroded to the point of non-existence by competition from cheaper countries and intransigent Union demands. And complacency and over-reliance on the strength of the City of London as a financial centre of enormous income. Britain is now unable to feed or clothe her population, and a frightening amount of everyday items have to be imported, because we simply don't make them anymore.

People now in their twenties and thirties are going to have to work incredibly hard, and save incredibly well, to afford any kind of quality of life in their twilight years. Our government is indecisive, incompetent, and unwilling to face the reality - that Brown has created Britain's economic vulnerability and weakness through his own actions while Chancellor. It's not a pretty sight.
none_too_subtle
Feb. 2nd, 2009 11:41 am (UTC)
And I'm sure you have an idea about what it's like here. I believe we're going back to two-generation family households because of all this. My mother predicted it years ago, and now it seems as if she was right. I had no idea you guys were that bad off, though.
writerwench
Feb. 2nd, 2009 11:48 am (UTC)
UK Ltd has been in trouble for years, but the Labour government has been busily denying it and lying in their teeth about unemployment statistics, actual productivity and export statistics, and right now there's thousands of power industry workers out on strike because a big refinery in England is expanding, and is it employing British workers? Is it heck! Because the refinery is owned by a French company, it's bringing in European workers to do the work - they're much less stroppy, demand much lower wages, and are generally much less trouble than British workers. There's a big debate raging now - back in '07, Our Supreme Leader Comrade Brown promised 'British jobs for British workers', and now he's being called on that promise... but it goes in the teeth of EU legislation and worker mobility throughout Europe. Protectionism is a BAAAAAD word.

We should never have joined the European Common Market, way back in the 70's - Britain has been fleeced and taxed and bullied and its industries undercut and eroded by EU Directives and commands ever since.
ayoub
Feb. 1st, 2009 10:37 am (UTC)
What web site was it? I'd like to look me up :D

And you look great without trying :D
none_too_subtle
Feb. 1st, 2009 11:01 am (UTC)
Ewwwwwwwww. I have to work at looking good!!! lol You guys just don't know what all we go through! :>
ayoub
Feb. 1st, 2009 02:07 pm (UTC)
I do appreciate all the hard work :D
none_too_subtle
Feb. 1st, 2009 02:14 pm (UTC)
Haha! But you're not close enough to see!
ayoub
Feb. 1st, 2009 02:20 pm (UTC)
A fact I lament often!
none_too_subtle
Feb. 1st, 2009 02:22 pm (UTC)
Come on over!!
ayoub
Feb. 1st, 2009 02:48 pm (UTC)
I wish!

:D
none_too_subtle
Feb. 2nd, 2009 11:41 am (UTC)
Make it happen!!
paradoxymoron
Feb. 2nd, 2009 08:27 am (UTC)
eeep! What's the website?
none_too_subtle
Feb. 2nd, 2009 11:37 am (UTC)
Did you read this? lol Read it one more time.
paradoxymoron
Feb. 2nd, 2009 05:43 pm (UTC)
...I don't know how to read. :(
none_too_subtle
Feb. 2nd, 2009 06:46 pm (UTC)
Which in this case a very good thing :>
paradoxymoron
Feb. 2nd, 2009 07:04 pm (UTC)
:P I miss you.
none_too_subtle
Feb. 2nd, 2009 08:02 pm (UTC)
Awww how sweet :> How could you miss me though? *stands right here*
paradoxymoron
Feb. 3rd, 2009 06:00 am (UTC)
Because we don't have that amazing thing where we pester each other for 20 comments every night. :D

Just once a week. :DDDD
none_too_subtle
Feb. 4th, 2009 04:44 pm (UTC)
That's cuz we're both busy now :>
paradoxymoron
Feb. 4th, 2009 05:50 pm (UTC)
I know! What with the wife and kids and all...
none_too_subtle
Feb. 4th, 2009 08:27 pm (UTC)
Yeah, she's gettin' on my nerves...
paradoxymoron
Feb. 5th, 2009 04:43 am (UTC)
Yeah, they tend to do that.
( 24 whispered — Speak )

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Words.

Here is Belladonna, the Lady of the Rocks,
The lady of situations.
Here is the man with three staves, and here the Wheel,
And here is the one-eyed merchant, and this card
Which is blank, is something that he carries on his back,
Which I am forbidden to see. I do not find
The Hanged Man. Fear death by water.
I see crowds of people, walking round in a ring.
Thank you. If you see dear Mrs. Equitone,
Tell her I bring the horoscope myself;

One must be so careful these days.
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