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Open letters to whomevers

Dear LJ:

Instead of not sending notifications of comments, please regurgitate them all up at one time, instead of choking out a random one-fer or two-fer at a time. You're fired.

Love and sloppy kisses -
T

Dear Mother Nature:

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE WEATHER TODAY!!! Tis glorious.

Thankfully yours -
Ter


Dear Deathmobile:

Now that you've beaten up two of my best friends, I think it's time we came to some sort of agreement on how you should behave whilst being worked on. I realize that you're one of those high maintenance types, but typically a Miata M-Class rarely has issues; so what bee's up your damn bonnet? I've had you worked on twice this year, and you throw another surprise in my direction.

If you don't correct yourself, Imma hafta kick that azz.

Seriously,
Your Mistress


Dear Regions Bank N.A.:

While AmSouth didn't give US a choice as to whom they merged, I need to inform you that your card services and employees thereof SUCK. I never had trouble with AmSouth, and this morning's little bit 'o fun was just another in a series of incidences that I've encountered since the merger.

Get it straight, or I'm switching to Wachovia.

Angry in Birmigham -
A customer
___________________________________________________________



Today's GOT TO get better. This is the kind of crap I'm dealing with on a daily basis, and the fun never stops here. I'm just waiting to see which monkey wrench will be slung at me after lunch. Yee Haw.

Comments

( 10 whispered — Speak )
farranger
Jan. 15th, 2010 06:25 pm (UTC)
Let's have a drink later.

Oh, wait...D'oh!
none_too_subtle
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:04 pm (UTC)
Plus I don't drink alcohol. I'd be crying in my Sprite. *sniff*
ayoub
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:02 pm (UTC)
All good letters...
none_too_subtle
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:05 pm (UTC)
See? All need to be taught lessons!!
sixgun45lc
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:08 pm (UTC)
"If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball!"
none_too_subtle
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:09 pm (UTC)
Ha!!! Where did that come from?
sixgun45lc
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:16 pm (UTC)
none_too_subtle
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:18 pm (UTC)
LOL! I haven't seen it, but I'm sure Kelsey has! So much for our quoting quotas. :> :D
sixgun45lc
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:40 pm (UTC)
She probably has. Some of the humor is sophomoric at best but it has its moments, like this one.
none_too_subtle
Jan. 15th, 2010 08:42 pm (UTC)
I like most juvenile movies, but just couldn't get into "Pineapple Express". Too busy or something. I loved Juno, though! :D
( 10 whispered — Speak )

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Words.

Here is Belladonna, the Lady of the Rocks,
The lady of situations.
Here is the man with three staves, and here the Wheel,
And here is the one-eyed merchant, and this card
Which is blank, is something that he carries on his back,
Which I am forbidden to see. I do not find
The Hanged Man. Fear death by water.
I see crowds of people, walking round in a ring.
Thank you. If you see dear Mrs. Equitone,
Tell her I bring the horoscope myself;

One must be so careful these days.
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