Creeping Through The Cellar Door (none_too_subtle) wrote,
Creeping Through The Cellar Door
none_too_subtle

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Civilization

I'm looking at my arms after reading theashifaction's post about shaving her arms. I thought I read it wrong the first time, thinking surely pits was in there somewhere. AHAHAHAHAHA. No. Um. Okay, so I look back down at my arms where there is NO. HAIR. AT. ALL. Well, I have a few little wispy random blonde hairs on my arms, but OMG. A whole LINE of girls started talking about their arms and how they shave/wax/etc. LOLOLOL. I'm not laughing AT them. I mean, we all have somethin' don't we? *looks at mirror* Even when I have goosebumps, as I do right now sitting in front of an open window with er...not much on, the poor little blonde hairs don't pike out and make themselves noticed. I'll NEVER look at a woman's arms the same again. Never. Ever. EVER.

Which, of course, leads me to K and her arms. Since she was about six, she's ALWAYS stared at her arms and wondered why o why she has hair on them, particularly since she outgrew MINE when she was 2. Uhhh. As a concerned, loving mom, I don't see the need to get rid of it. She's already shaving her legs (well, she did a couple of times til the novelty wore off...heh). But I feel if I say "Yeah, sweetheart, that's some serious hairage on your arms, let's get 'em waxed QUICK" it would kill her self esteem. Nor do I see the necessity in it. :-/ But after reading all that, I wonder if women who DO have this um hair on them that is noticeable worried about it when they were kids, or waited until they were adults? And why did they feel the need to get rid of it? Don't get me wrong -- I've gotta say being turned on to theashifaction's journal was one of the best moves I've made on LJ, if for nothing other than her one lined humor. It's almost like she leaves her journal up all day while being mom and doing her mom thing, and occasionally has a wild hair (hahaha) and writes it down real quick, then zips back to being a mom. But now I'm freaked about the arm hair thing. :-I THANKS.



My landlady
So I'm pondering arm/body hair (heh), when I hear this BOOMING OLD LADY VOICE: HELLO, TERRI! YIKKKKKKKKES. My landlady was standing outside my BEDROOM WINDOW. OMG. I hate it when she sneaks up on me. She was thanking me for rent. UH. Ya know...if I had a CHOICE, I'm thinking I'd trim off a couple of hundred dollars off this place :/ So I'm sitting here, with disheveled hair, no makeup, a little white t-shirt, and opened the blinds. She had on her old lady thing, with makeup, too much perfume, a floral dress (her husband's a preacher), looking at me as if I was some miscreant indigent from Jimmy Hale's. Hahahaha. She probably thought: "Uhhh...we're not gonna renew THAT lease, if this place is turning her into Quasimoto."

Note to self, #94: Don't answer the WINDOW. You answer DOORS. Not WINDOWS.

The fun didn't stop Friday night
Weeeeee! Four squad cars, yesterday afternoon were BLOCKING ME IN. THE NERVE. All of them, however were casing Celia's place, and I heard her out there, lying her ever lovin' ass off. Was I gonna let her get away with it this time? NO. She was the one to knock on my door, so I was more than happy to cooperate with the police :) Heh. She said something about Allison being with her, and I said: "Allison was with (name withheld to protect a notoriously guilty person here) and some other guy, Celia. I watched, and had a camera on the action last night." Hahahaha. OMG. The black guy who drove up in that same gray car that drug dealer boy had the night before, was just about to leave, when I pointed out (or reminded) the fem police officer that THIS was the car she failed to run down the other day. Heh. The searched the car from the engine to the trunk. So solly. They told Celia to wait inside (with the fem), and four officers came in here. Great. Of course I know all the details. I live by my window. Heh. I'm gonna start my own drive-through. I told them every detail of not only the night before, but hypotheses of other occasions, not leaving out the fact that he tried to open doors (not just mine, but others) in the middle of the night. He's in jail; but now, I think EVERYone associated with him will be there, too. They asked if I've ever seen the black guy before, and I told them every month, like clockwork. I could set my CLOCK on this guy showing up, backing into this guy's place, staying for half an hour and leaving. You tell ME WHAT THEY'RE DOING. This guy was a big old redneck. I've heard him talk in a not-so-friendly way about "all others", and he's the epitomy of the 'Alabama Redneck.' So to say this guy was his 'friend' is RIDICULOUS. Anyway...the car's still here, and right after the police left, Celia hauled ace outta here, too. Yeah heh. I don't think we'll be seeing much o dem in the future.

Der polizei are your friends :D
Timing is everything, and G.I. Joe called, after pulling a double at the department. I told him to come on over (you know -- two guns are better than one), and that was that. They're actually assembling a narcotics task force (which I'm not supposed to get in to here) in collaboration with er...the military. Jess, I paid attention, and I'm thinking what they're doing is unconstitutional. We argued that one a few times (he IS very smart; one of the very few police officers I know with a master's and still under 35), and he finally agreed. Buttt of course he did. I feel, however, that even though it IS unconstitutional to use the military to police our own people, drug dealers freakin' lose ANY rights when they start peddling to kids. And yes, they do. All of them. I've watched. They don't care who the customer is, as long as they're making money. I know this first hand, as I busted my brother with enough weed to send him to prison when he was 15 years' old (he was holding for a dealer). Don't THINK I won't go along with it, keep their secrets and even help if I can. Don't get me wrong -- I think marijuana should be legalized, and ALCOHOL taken off the market. At least scooby snacks make the user calm and want to stay put instead of getting behind the wheel of the car. But these days, the only scooby snack smokers *I* know are adults. I don't do it, because when I tried it in college, it made me feel stupid and out of control. Eeee. But kids are doing hard stuff now. Of course I digress, and this ain't a thesis on drugs, but...I'll work with them, just as I did with John. We see he doesn't live here anymore. Let me see one more, and they won't live here, either.

Let me just say for the record that I feel the ONLY reason scooby snacks are illegal is because the government can't find a way to tax something you can grow in your backyard. Except in Alaska. THEY can grow it in their own yards. WTH? Aren't we ALL living in the same country?! LOL. Bastidges. If the drunk driver who hit me several years ago had just partaken in scooby snacks instead of Mad Dog, my body wouldn't be piece-mealed together. And that's that.

Nair
So the arm hair thing still baffles and frightens me. I had a roommate once when I first returned to Birmingham (old HS friend). She was absolutely BEAUTIFUL. Long, dark curly hair, green eyes, just gorgeous. The first 'swimming' day of the year, we were both getting ready to go to the pool, and I couldn't HELP but notice this thatch of hair growing on her lower back. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAACKKKKKKKKKK! I told her to do something about it (as a good friend SHOULD), and she said she didn't even know it existed! OMG. WTH? Then, I started thinking about alllllllll the guys she and I dated, and er...wondered how THEY felt if they ever got their hands on her lower back. LOL. Um. Okay. Enough of all that. It ALLL makes sense now. Heh.


Whew. That was long. I hope NONE of you were clazy enough to read it all. If so, that'll teach ya.
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