Here is your horoscope
for Tuesday, December 21:
Smoothing those troubled waters will come easily, as long as you're ready to compromise -- even if it means you have to promise to try harder. It's prime time to accept and deliver apologies.
Dear UPS man:
I'd love to apologize -- in advance -- about that baseball bat that made contact with your melon when you filled out that card, instead of deigning to WALK THE ITEM TO MY DOOR.
And since my horrible scope SAID SO, I'll try "harder" not to swing the bat that fast next time. Consider this my compromise.
Love and sloppy kisses --
And where's my UPS SUCKS icon?! Gah I need it right now. Of course, Kelsey's BIG present is being delivered (free delivery, of course) via UPS. So not only am *I* on the lookout, but RoseMarie is, too. We just got through laughing it up outside about how those losers, in their crappy brown trucks, fill out the "sorry you weren't home!" sticky notes in advance. I think they get a bonus for making multi-tries or something. This time, however, we've got a system down. We're gonna tag team that sucker, and beat him with a baseball bat. Bastidges. Last time they showed up, TWO GUYS were in the truck, and when the first one approached my door (I was lying-in-wait, I might add) he DIDN'T EVEN HAVE THE PACKAGE...JUST THE NOTE. OMG. I asked him WTH was going on, and why was he giving me an "attempt" message when I'm standing LIKE RIGHT THERE.
SEE!!! GrRRRrrrrr. UPS, how I hate thee! Let me count the ways. Mkay, no. Just. No.
Yeah so... for some reason, at the end of each day, I end up with the most crappy cases. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. If it's a crappy case, with some liar involved, I'M gonna get 'em, running their mouths trying to explain how it couldn't have been their fault, because Uranus wasn't aligned with Venus, and, and...that yellow line USED to be here, but now there's just a pothole...
Yeah whatever. You'll get ZIP. NEXXXXXXXXXT. It gets old. I'm SO jaded. Today, Charlotte and I decided to take three courses our company offers (and pays for). Not only do we get to take time off to take them, but the company pays for our books AND we get a bonus!! WOOO. So...we've decided to take them at the same time.
Yeahhh buddy...show me ONE THING more sessayyy than the insurance bidness. I dare ya. Hahahaha
Anyway yeah. I'm glad to be outta there, and the Puerto Rican thing was rounding our area like a vulture today. Was kinda funny. :) Umm...surely he realizes how obvious it is?! Yeah. So after my elevator horror (they didn't even squeeze around, but rather made me squish into the middle of 'em), I was ready to get away from men...like, all of 'em.
We were talking about our husbands (hahahaha husbandS), and I told Diann I was more of a "catch-and-release" kinda girl. Much hilarity ensued at MY EXPENSE (since they all know a little bit about all three of those train wrecks)...er...that'll teach me. I told them if I ever said "marriage" again, they all had my permission to shoot me.
That's probably not the smartest thang I've ever said to...er, any of 'em. Although they all seem to have a healthy amount of...fear of me :D LOL. *I* can't help it if my stride is about 20 feet per foot, and my legs are long, gah. I think the way we walk intimidates other people. Or something. Today, I had to spend a LOT of time training two of our employees on software. THE JOY. THE HORROR. When I finished, I said "Okay...so you guys won't forget this, will ya?" to which they BOTH responded "Probably."
Umm...I'm GOOD at teaching people. I'm just sayin'...if either of them DARES to ask me a question about what I taught them today, I'm gonna be forced to stab 'em in the face with a fork.
And having said all THAT, I think it's time I read my anger management book, and get ready to ambush UPS. Which incidentally stands for Ur People Suck</b>. Yeah. That.
That is all.