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This isn't a joke. This is serious curiousity, so please refrain from doing your usual fun thing of answering sarcastically. I just wonder how many people (if any) think *this* is ever an option...

Poll #465155 Respect and disrespect, friendship and...idiocy

What would you consider THE most disrespectful thing that could be said to you?

Please listen to me.
I have something to say...are you busy?

You smell a rat. But you're tired, and don't want to deal with it (nor really CARE). So...

Really need to go to bed, and expect friends to understand, and say "bye."
Hang around to placate someone ELSE; they NEED to explain why they're being sneaky.
You've been told to shut up. So NOW, you're too angry to sleep. You create a poll.
You disappear. Temporarily.
You disappear. Forever.

If you're someone's friend, and have let them know you think they're a friend:

...they will respect your desires, as you do theirs.
...all options will be weighed, due to importance and timing.
...realize they're tired, but YOU have something to say, so you tell them to SHUT UP AND LISTEN.
...er...what were we talking about again?
A combination of a couple of these.

In *your* world, who says "shut up" and means it (if *anyone*)?

My kids. But not to my face.
My kids are smarter than that. No one says that.
A dominating, control-freakin' who probably suffers from "little-man-syndrome".
Someone incapable of controlling themselves, who need to act out regularly.
Friendless people. But nobody listens nor cares. Sad, really.

Honestly; what's the *worst* thing that someone could say to you, and make you feel you're being disrespected?

Is "shut up" ever a REAL option to say to someone, even in jest?

Never. Unless they still speak in clicks and grunts and know no better.
When *I* was a kid, if you said "shut up" you were in BIG TROUBLE.
No one is that stupid. Please tell me this is a joke.
I say "shut up" but I'm kidding. Um...maybe I should rethink that behavior.
I say shut up and mean it. I respect NO ONE, particularly myself.

Mkay. It's been a loooong, rough day. Thought I got all my journaling out of my system, am prepared for tomorrow...and of *all* the FREAKIN' CONTROLLING/STUPID, MAN-SUPERIOR things to say was uttered to me. Something I haven't heard since freakin' grade school (or no, wait -- the WARDEN; EVEN WORSE).

Shut up.

HOLY SHIT. NO ONE. IN THIS WORLD. HAS THE RIGHT TO EVER. EVER. FREAKIN' EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR tell me to shut up, particularly when I'm TRYING to get things done and go to bed.

Man. Talk about killing absolutely any respect I might've had for that person. Boom. Just like that. I thought only kids (or total psychos) were STUPID enough to say "shut up," and worse -- really mean it. LOL. No, wait. I take that back. I know 11-year-olds who're more mature.

Unreal. I'm seriously sitting here, not BELIEVING someone had the tenacity to say something so...ridiculously disrespectful and for totally selfish and also deceptive reasons in the first place.

1. I wanted to go to bed. I NEED sleep. Bad. Those of you who know me, definitely understand (or so I hope/think).
2. I expressed this.
3. While expressing this, was told to SHUT UP AND LISTEN.
4. This is my ass. This is my ass walking OUT THE DOOR.

Friends? It would take some SERIOUS ass-kissing and begging forgiveness for me to get over this one.

Girls and guys? A word to the wise. Never EVER tell anyone to "shut up." It makes you wonder what kind of grown up/friend/PARENT (sadly) would say that, or if they even QUALIFY. See? This is the very definition of "divorce." I can't think of *any* girl here, or elsewhere who'd deal with that, not even during 'bedroom sports.'

I'm really open-minded, respectful, sometimes overly-eager to communicate (but in a positive way), never judgmental. Sure, I get cranky, particularly when I feel bad (physically) and have had a rough day. But I don't take it OUT on anyone. In fact, I'll go in to hiding if I know I am too tired/in pain/sleepy to communicate. One fact remains: I *will* be respected above and beyond ALL things in *my* world. There is not one human on this PLANET who has the right, or ever WILL, to say that to me.

Even if it was "joking" it wouldn't have been funny. And what precipitated it? A hidden agenda (which I REALLY don't give a rat's patootie about; this is what my lil friend didn't "get"...lolol...SO? I CARE YOU'RE BEING SNEAKY BECAUSE??). I think...not.

People. Can't help but lose faith in them when they show how big of a jackass they really are. I love my friends; but not ONE of them has EVER told me to "shut up" nor would they.

And you can bet your last dollar that will never be said to me again, and gotten away with. Ohhhhhhh no. Not ever. Right now, I'm trying real hard to contain a very childish anger in response to such idiocy.

Okay. Glad I got all that out of my system. I feel better now. :-D

Define "friend."

Be it. Or get out of my life. Very simple, even for the village idiot.

Your participation is greatly appreciated, as always. :)


( 28 whispered — Whisper to me )
Mar. 31st, 2005 04:56 am (UTC)
In my defense on me saying shut up. I couldnt say that I never say the words because in jest and in a joking situation I have said... "noooo shut up are you kidding me?"

I dont however tell people I respect to shut up in any serious situation.
Mar. 31st, 2005 04:59 am (UTC)
I've never seen/read you say "shut up" and mean it (or more precisely, not termed that way).

It WON'T be tolerated by me.

Let's say Clay did something a little "sly"...you question him about it (after telling him you're EXHAUSTED and need sleep...bad). You plead your case, explaining you're exhausted and he says "shut up!" He's serious. He really REALLY wants to explain why he's being sneaky.

How well would that bode?
Mar. 31st, 2005 05:08 am (UTC)
Im not sure because It hasn't happened in that context. It probably would piss me off but I wouldn't be calling a divorce lawyer over it.

That is just me though.

Mar. 31st, 2005 05:12 am (UTC)
"It hasn't happened in that context."

Okay. Scenario two: you have someone who is a friend. A male friend. He's not kidding, and tells you to "shut up" because he's trying to explain...questionable behavior that HONESTLY you're too tired to listen to, and seriously don't CARE about (really...you don't care; you just want/need to go to bed, because work comes early, etc. etc.).

Is there EVER a justifiable reason for a MAN to tell a WOMAN to shut up, particularly one he "likes" or calls "friend"?
Mar. 31st, 2005 05:14 am (UTC)

if it occured he would get directions to the door.

Mar. 31st, 2005 05:18 am (UTC)
There ya go. If you and I were talking on the phone (although this didn't happen on the phone, nor in person) and jokingly you said "Terri OMG shut up!" I'd probably laugh (even if I *was* exhausted). In fact, when I think about it, although no one's EVER said "shut up" except The Warden (and even he added "please" making it no BETTER), women *might* be able to get away with it. They don't have ulterior motives with me (you know what I mean).

Men, on the other hand, want to control us. SOME men. And we ALL KNOW how *I* HATE that, friend, acquaintance, whatever. NO MAN. WILL EVER. HAVE THE RIGHT TO TELL ME TO SHUT UP.

That's just how *I* see it. Even if I was madly in love, I don't even feel it would be an issue. I honest-to-God couldn't LOVE someone who even *thinks* on that low-level mentality. But that's just me. UNREAAAL.

Gads, I'm worn out now :-D Poll was a good idea. LOL :)
Mar. 31st, 2005 12:51 pm (UTC)
Twice in my life I've been told to shut up by people other than my parents when I was a child.

Both times I did exactly that, and to this day, have never spoken to either of them again. I see both of them occasionally and both still try to apologize and "explain".

Its unforgivable in my book. Even my hubby wouldn't tell me to shut up, under ANY circumstances.
Mar. 31st, 2005 01:38 pm (UTC)
That's my point (although, I knew you felt the same way *I* did about this one).

If anyone even came *close* to having "the right" to tell you to shut up, it would be someone who freakin' supports you 100%; and even THEN, NO. It is abuse, plain and simple (I wish I could find the link to that document which listed this as one of more severely abusive terms).

Yeahhhh. So right. AND I was blocked/hidden/trying to go to bed. Go figure. I'm sorry; but only KELSEY supersedes sleep and even then, she's respectful enough to let me go to bed when *I* want to.
Mar. 31st, 2005 06:57 pm (UTC)
I seriously need some T&T time.

With any luck, my "nothing to do but laundry" Sat will hold up.

Will you be around?
Mar. 31st, 2005 11:08 pm (UTC)
I'm not real sure about what's happening Saturday. I'm running a fever (still or again or whatever...*sigh*), so I need to control it and make sure Kelsey isn't at any risk of contracting this. :/ So...I might be around. We need to talk anyway. Too much is going on that I can't say in here (nor would I) and really need to talk to you about.
Mar. 31st, 2005 06:19 pm (UTC)
Whilst occasionally used while joking with someone (as in they say something truly outrageous/funny and I reply with "shut up" in an obviously joking/laughing manner), to my mind no adult should have to tolerate seriously being told to shut up by anyone else. Period.
Mar. 31st, 2005 11:05 pm (UTC)
Honest to GOD, I don't even "joke" with that one. It's *just as bad* as calling someone...well, a horrible name (even in jest). Think of some of the stronger "bad words/names"; shut up would be included on that list to me.

It's also very controlling and abusive behavior (still looking for the article I read not too long ago about the "key words" in verbally abusive situations -- not that I *need* a guideline). If it makes you feel bad, triviliazes you, demeans you, degrades you, feels controlling and/or inappropriate, then it shouldn't be tolerated. Ever. I know *I* won't deal with it; in fact, I can't remember when anyone in real life told me to shut up (even as a child, I don't think anyone did). So...omg...blood pressure, through the roof, end of story. Ugh.
Mar. 31st, 2005 11:12 pm (UTC)
I am in total agreement with the entire second paragraph of your comment. And if this particular turn of phrase is one that, for you, is just not acceptable under any circumstances, then it is indeed unfortunate that someone was a dork. Damage done. Hard to get the bullet back once it's gone downrange, right?
Mar. 31st, 2005 11:55 pm (UTC)
Typically, I don't hold grudges (as we all know). Buttt on this one, I think I'm going to have to stand my ground. I mean, if someone so...insignificant feels they're empowered enough to say something like that (and continue to "try" and say things WHILE I'M BLOCKED), then GOD only knows what kind of stalker freak they *could* be, ya know?

The unknown variables are too risky for me. Not that I'm afraid *I*'ll get hurt, but moreover, that I'll take someone ELSE out. We all know how I am. :D LOL.
Apr. 1st, 2005 01:56 am (UTC)

Whoops... ;)
Apr. 1st, 2005 04:52 am (UTC)
"But officer...it slipped, and I was JUST KIDDING."

Apr. 1st, 2005 05:10 pm (UTC)
yeah. That's kind of like...

BLAM! "Stop!" BLAMBLAM "Or I'll shoot!" BLAM
Apr. 1st, 2005 05:33 pm (UTC)

It's a good thing I'm NOT in law enforcement, because I'd probably have the highest fatality (or at LEAST disability) rate goin' on in my department. ;-)
Apr. 1st, 2005 06:34 pm (UTC)
Yeah, you'd be spending a great deal of time on paid adminstrative leave, I'm thinking.

"We would have believed your story that this was an accidental shooting except for the fact that you reloaded your revolver twice..."
Apr. 1st, 2005 10:10 pm (UTC)
REVOLVER MY ACE. I'd be all ghetto, using a semi-automatic. HAHAHA.

Yeah -- admin leave. I need that NOW.
Apr. 1st, 2005 11:11 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I know you'd be all holdin yo 9 sideways an shit, yo, but the joke is more funny when you consider what a pain in the butt is can be to reload a revolver.
Apr. 1st, 2005 11:24 pm (UTC)
Hahaha. I'm slow on the uptake today. I'm dealing with a fever, impending company move, too much work, little sleep and dealing with idiots. :)
Apr. 2nd, 2005 06:49 am (UTC)
Consider this tidbit of modern corporate-think for a moment: there is no "I" in TEAM, but there are two "I"s in IDIOT...
Apr. 2nd, 2005 08:06 pm (UTC)
That's funny considering as we speak, I've been dealing with TWO IDIOTS ever since I patted my friend on the back for defending herself in that child free community. LOL. Really, it's too funny.
Apr. 4th, 2005 06:46 pm (UTC)
Two I's, two idiots. I sense trend.
Apr. 4th, 2005 10:02 pm (UTC)
*Was trying to think of a clever two I/eye saying, but am unable to*

Indeeeeed. But they've gone away now. Well, at least they've stopped commenting. LOL. They're STILL READING (I've been checking the ole code...pfft). ;-)
Apr. 4th, 2005 10:45 pm (UTC)
You do attract the freaks, don't you?
Apr. 4th, 2005 11:18 pm (UTC)
Truer words were ne'er spoken, m'dear :)

( 28 whispered — Whisper to me )


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