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Fall The Fall

...not the season; but a reason.



Or at least what I look like. Gotta remember today. Unbelievable. UN.BE.LIEV.A.BLE.

Dear Kelsey:

I'm SO glad you're not a material girl, because thanks to the "graciousness" of MB50, looks like we won't have a Christmas.

I'll tell ya when you're older. Like 30 or so.

Love --
Your mom, who's REALLY trying to keep her sheize together


I'm way too tired to do anything, much less an update. The Cliff Notes -- although very enlightening and interesting (note to self re: DH revelations regarding his "50-something-year-old-friend-with-benefits-UGH) that make it REAL easy to let go, and all other, more serious things.

Boyscout called this morning, offering his support; should've taken him up on the headrub after all this crap. JJ, however, was with me. After the horror and reality of my little situation finally settled in, and I literally broke down, he put his arm around me.

Yeah. I've shed more tears today than all this year (probably needed to). Again, best saved for a personal entry. Way too sensitive (and potentially damaging to...what's left of my life. Got to be too much, and I just broke down. In retrospect I should've tried to hang on until we got back here. Er, right.

Going STRAIGHT to bed after this.

WHAT A DAY. I'm also now a lovely $1,200 or so poorer than I started off (which has to be paid MONTHLY). It's freakin' tragic. No other way to put it.

Yeah. I'm going to bed.

Tomorrow /has/ to be better.

Did get mail from graphics department. Encouraging no less. The rest of the day was straight-up/kick-arse work and then ALL THAT CRAP.

Ya gotta know when to stop journaling publicly I'm thinking. This is one of those times. Ja. I'm out.

Comments

( 8 whispered — Whisper to me )
vitalessence
Nov. 17th, 2005 03:14 am (UTC)
just wondering what MB50 is?

and *HUG*
none_too_subtle
Nov. 17th, 2005 05:07 am (UTC)
Er...I'll tell you in one of your entries, since it's semi-locked.
vitalessence
Nov. 17th, 2005 05:18 am (UTC)
oh my gosh! Why aren't you in bed lil lady??? That's where I'm off to now... g'night!
none_too_subtle
Nov. 17th, 2005 05:20 am (UTC)
Too much going on in my noodle; can't stay asleep. Tomorrow is going to be ROUGH.
steveronson
Nov. 17th, 2005 03:38 am (UTC)
what i have, i send to you.
none_too_subtle
Nov. 17th, 2005 05:09 am (UTC)
No, no, no sweetie...that's for you. Just your well wishes and prayers if you're that kind of guy, for a bigger resolution with better outcomes al the way around. =/
sixgun45lc
Nov. 17th, 2005 06:26 pm (UTC)
I don't know the details, obviously, but I send yoou all of the positive thoughts and wishes and such anyway. :)
none_too_subtle
Nov. 17th, 2005 07:24 pm (UTC)
Thanks, sweetie.
( 8 whispered — Whisper to me )

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none_too_subtle
Creeping Through The Cellar Door

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Words.

Here is Belladonna, the Lady of the Rocks,
The lady of situations.
Here is the man with three staves, and here the Wheel,
And here is the one-eyed merchant, and this card
Which is blank, is something that he carries on his back,
Which I am forbidden to see. I do not find
The Hanged Man. Fear death by water.
I see crowds of people, walking round in a ring.
Thank you. If you see dear Mrs. Equitone,
Tell her I bring the horoscope myself;

One must be so careful these days.

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